What is in a name?

It’s a tale as old as time. Well, not really as old as time but as old as Facebook.

The dreaded Real Name Policy! *Cue blood curdling scream*

Facebook has this weird policy whereby users are required to use their “real name” in order to have access to their site. What exactly constitutes a “real name”? Is it the name I was born with? The name my friends use? The name I go by at work?

I go by a few names. The one I am known by the absolute least is the name that is on my birth certificate. I simply do not use that name. There is one person in the entire world who calls me by that name and she is the woman who gave birth to me and bestowed that name upon me. Thanks mum!

According to Facebook their “real name policy” ensures that “…you always know who you’re connecting with. This helps keep our community safe” Erm… how exactly? Literally only my mother uses my “real name”!

Facebook believes that “authentic identity is important to the Facebook experience, and our goal is that every account on Facebook should represent a real person”. Lets consider that for a second shall we? How many fake accounts are there on Facebook? I’m going to guess — millions! I know many people who have fake accounts. Some for nefarious purposes. Some not so much.

So why do I use a name that isn’t my “real name”? There are many reasons. I am a survivor of rape and domestic abuse. The last time I was forced to use my “real name” on Facebook, a previous abuser found me and started hassling me. I was also bullied a lot at school and there are many people I don’t wish to connect with. Using a pseudonym means they are unlikely to realise I was the kid they used to kick the shit out of. The other main reason I don’t use my “real name” is becasue I am transgender. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you what the world at large thinks of transgender people.

What it all boils down to is my personal safety. I don’t feel safe using my “real name”.

In 2014, Chris Cox — Chief Product Officer at Facebook issued a statement as follows:

I have repeatedly attempted to contact Facebook in order to have my account restored but to no avail. In previous years, I have been able to help LGBTQ+ performers and artists have their chosen names restored and thought my own battle was won in 2017 when a Facebook staff member confirmed that it was, indeed, OK for me to use the name OddSocks.

I have had a few other run-ins with the “policy” since but every time, my account has been restored within a day or two. This time, I have been locked out of my account and I am unable to provide further evidence that OddSocks is the name I am known by. I am now stuck in purgatory until such a time that Facebook either verifies my name again or forces me to use my birth name yet again.

It seems ridiculously unfair that I am unable to use the name OddSocks on Facebook as a way of protecting myself from previous abusers but it’s ok for people to abuse me on Facebook!

I have been through all of the channels to try and get my name restored. Even offering to use my “real name” but my pleas have fallen on deaf ears.

If anyone has any advice on how best to get past this, I would be most grateful. I have lost 13 years of photographs, memories, connections and more and I’m honestly at my wits end now!

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